30 Kokomo Situations That Are Awkward For No Reason
By THE KOKOMO POST STAFF
Life can just be embarrassing and awkward, and some of us are more prone to awkward situations than others. But there are certain parts of Kokomo life that are more excruciating than others. Here’s 30 of our favorites.
1. Getting out of the pool floats in the Lazy River at Kokomo Beach.
2. When you get to the front of the line at Dan’s Donuts and remember it’s cash or check only.
3. Sitting there while they sing happy birthday to you at Hacienda.
4. When people actually eat the popcorn at Rural King.
5. When you’re already late and hit every red light on Markland.
6. Pretending to need something else at Sunspot until someone else moves out of the way of what you actually need.
7. When you say goodbye at the AMC movie and then both parked on the same side of the parking lot and have to walk together to your cars.
8. When you eat a family-sized meal from Country Squire by yourself.
9. Walking back to your seat after bowling at Don Lowry Lanes.
10. When you tell the people at J. Edwards it’s your birthday just for the sparkler candle that comes with the cake.
11. When you see someone at the Kroger parking lot from far away and you have to wait until they are close to say hi.
12. When you go to the store to buy dog food, in sweats with no makeup — and suddenly it’s a high school reunion.
13. When you hear sirens but there’s nothing on Kokomo Scanner.
14. Feeling judged by the person cleaning out your car at Marie’s Carwash.
15. When you still call it “31” even though it’s been “931” for years now.
16. When everyone at the pool party has the same Target swimsuit as you.
17. When someone gets to Half Moon ahead of you and you don’t know where they are sitting so you have to go on a scavenger hunt through nine seating locations to find them.
18. When you want to go to B&K on a Sunday.
19. When you’re walking to your car at Markland Mall during the holidays and someone is following you to take your spot.
20. When you’ve said “ope, I’m just gonna squeeze right past ya” at Meijer one too many times.
21. When you enter the main entrance of Markland Mall parking lot off of 931 and don’t know who gets to go first.
22. When you’ve eaten so many free chips and salsa at Hacienda and you’re afraid that one day they might cut you off.
23. Every time you try to pronounce Petite Patisserie.
24. When you run into your child’s teacher at Soupley’s.
25. Walking too slowly at any crosswalk downtown, so you break into a weird, slow jog.
26. That time the C and R neon lights went out on the Golden Corral sign, and teenage boys giggled for months.
27. When you try to use the Gas Tower as a navigational landmark, but it’s been gone for a long time.
28. When the chef at Taku gives someone else at your table a larger portion of fried rice than you got and the world seems unfair.
29. When your parents add an S to everything: “Kroger’s,” “Meijer’s,” etc.
30. When you go out of town, and someone asks you where you’re from and they immediately start singing the Beach Boys’ song.
